Life can be like a windstorm for kids in preschool. Between play dates, preschool, and daycare, they may feel like the adults in their lives don’t really see them. If you want your child to feel special, loved, and valued, try to give them these five special moments every day.
Put Down Your Phone
It’s so easy, but it’s so important! Studies show that kids can tell when their parents are more interested in their phones than in them. They want to be the focus of your attention. So turn off your phone when you are with them. Even better, move it to another room. If you’re expecting an important phone call or message, turn up the ringer and tell your child you may have to leave for a moment. But other than that, your focus is on them.
Say Things in Their “Love Language.”
Does your child like to hug? Do they like to give and get gifts? Do they tell you all the time that they love you? Find out how they give and receive love best, and show them love in a way that fits them. This can be very useful if you have more than one child. When you say “I love you” in a different way to each person, it shows that you’re paying attention and not just giving half-hearted praise.
Spend Extra Time With Them
It could be something like “National [Child’s Name] Day” or “Go Get Doughnuts with Dad Day” on Saturday mornings. Again, this is very useful if you have more than one child. Each person will know when they will have your full attention. This gives them a chance to talk to you or ask you questions they might not want to do when other people are around.
Make sure your child has a say in how you spend time together. (For example, don’t take them for a walk if they don’t like being outside.) This small investment could be the way you show your love for your child that he or she remembers and loves for years to come.
Pay Attention to What They Like
It’s easy to forget that your kids are just little people, but when someone shows interest in the things they like, everyone feels special. And we know it’s hard to hear your child talk about the same Paw Patrol episode for the millionth time. But showing interest, asking questions, and learning more about the things they like shows them that you find them interesting and worth your time. Also, if they like the same things as you do, they will run to you the next time something exciting happens. And what parent wouldn’t be happy about that?!
Provide Genuine Praise
Even if you think you praise your kids enough, step back and ask yourself, “What am I praising them for?” If that’s all they do, praising them actually makes them do worse. If everything they do is special, nothing they do is special. Dr. Monica Foley tells parents that the kind of praise they give is more important than how much praise they give. She says that you should praise them when they do something unusual or when they are trying hard to reach a goal. In other words, it’s more important how hard they try than how well they do.
None of these ideas needs to take a whole day. A child can feel special, seen, and loved with as little as 10 minutes of uninterrupted quality time or a single act done on purpose. This list shows that even the busiest parent can find small, special ways to say “I love you” to their kids.